sometimes.
sometimes i am afraid,
but i am still excited.
sometimes i feel pushed into a corner,
but at others, i feel on top of the world.
i want to thrive in certain moments,
but sometimes i just want to exist.
i want to matter to the world,
but more importantly i want the world
to matter to me.
i want to worry about the real things in life
and forget about the superficial quandaries
that filtrate what is or at least could be real.
sometimes i wish for more
instead of seeing everything i have.
and i want to believe
and never stop,
but not just sometimes,
always.

bruised, bashed, and bandaged
by seemingly smaller and smaller strands of hope.
hiding underneath a feign fantasy in which the world
really cares and that sincerity and kindness
are not over rated, but exist in purity.
this desirable dream diminishes daily
and another thread breaks.

today is extraordinarily different
yet exactly the same as yesterday,
like all days...
dramatic
yet lame.
busy but slow
incredibly confused
but knowing all the answers.
i am ready for tomorrow.
to jump
not up or down
but far
and away from myself
from the sadness that i am drowning in.
i want to be clear
without knowing the answers
and i want to believe
even against the odds
to see
in complete blindness
to trust without fear.
today is exactly the same as yesterday,
yet extraordinarily different.

let not your eyes deceive you.
simply understand
what is as certain
as the sun's passing by.

uncomplicate the truth.
do not make it more,
do not make it less.
make it real, make it known.